This week began with a lot of heat -- both literally outside and figuratively from those around me. With summer and the end of our year of service approaching, things are becoming a little tense. Most people are trying to amp up their work to ensure a successful year while others seem to be more interested in the freedom that summer promises. It was a difficult beginning of the week for me because I was feeling the frustration from everyone.
In Language Arts, students spent the week writing a persuasive essay. They had to pick a topic and a position that could be defended. A few students decided to write about gay marriage. I knew that this was a touchy subject simply because it is very controversial. My concern solidified because I know that these students may not fully understand the topic but are at an age when they will defend their feelings and opinions very strongly. Thankfully, the discussion was relatively civil – especially compared to the rants that many adults engage in.
I was very proud of the students for standing up for themselves, especially those who preached tolerance. Regardless of your feelings on gay marriage, I think it's important to respect our fundamental humanity – especially when having a disagreement. Some students attempted to rope the teacher into the conversation and while she did share her feelings, she did so while saying, "I don't really know much about it so I don't think it's fair for me to make a decision on it." I jumped in and reminded the students that above all else, respect was the primary tool for having these conversations. Though some may write these thirteen year olds off as culturally unaware and ignorant, I was very proud to see them becoming interested in the world's affairs.
Still, there was a lot of indolence around me, especially with my fellow corps members. When I'm around high levels of disinterest, I become easily frustrated. "I know there's work to be done, so why aren't you doing it?" I think to myself. Luckily, Thursday brought a big evening of preparation for NESA – New England Service Academy. This event was born out of NELA, a conference of corps members from CY Boston and CY Rhode Island. Only a few of us from CYNH were able to attend NELA and we thought, "Wouldn't it be great if we could get our three sites in their entirety together for a few days of service?"
Well, one of our corps members, Sarah, took the initiative and began planning an event that would unite us. We're calling it NESA and it's happening next Friday. The event may seem like a relatively small affair – one day of service with the Rhode Island corps – but it's a very big deal requiring a lot of planning and preparation. It is entirely corps-driven and we've been doing a majority of the work. On Thursday evening, we had to stay later to do some preparation for the event and an information session on Friday. Though I'm doing more work, I'm happier. It has given me something to focus my energy on and I'm incredibly excited! It was exactly what the second half of my week needed.
Friday was a day of looking to the future, both in the short term and the long term. In the morning, we had Make It Better conversations, designed to improve various aspects of our service. We were able to give feedback on PT, Cross Product Teams, IJ, Friday trainings and other elements of City Year culture. There were a lot of good conversations and it energized me. I get to be a part of the implementation of the improvements that will come from these feedback sessions. That afternoon, I was able to be part of rollouts for both NESA and a new thing that the Resource Development team is introducing. As the FY11 Resource Development Project Leader, I will be leading a lot of rollouts and will take a much larger role in leading corps members. Friday gave me the chance to begin working on those skills. Overall, my service on Thursday and Friday reminded me why I serve – I get the chance to work incredibly hard to make this world a better place and I'm proud of the work I do.
Friday, May 28, 2010
Friday, May 21, 2010
Struggles, Victories and Coming Full Circle
Things are winding down at City Year New Hampshire. We only have a few weeks left in the schools and I am doing my best to help my students get ready for high school. I am concerned about a few of them. "Audrey" and "Alyssa" were both resistant to doing work this week. On Monday, they were assigned a math worksheet. When they were unable to get a problem correct immediately, they shut down, saying "I'm not doing this." I tried to push them to work but they weren't having any of it. It was very frustrating; I don't want them to shut down like this when presented with a challenge. But their lives are in their hands; I can't do everything for them. I have to hope that some of what I model and teach gets through to them and they are better off now than they would've been without me.
But there have also been some victories. "Shirley" and "Whitney" have made incredible progress since the beginning of the year. In math class, Shirley figured out how to find the area of an irregular figure with minimal guidance from me. When I told her how smart she is and great she is doing, I caught her smiling. I'm really hoping that Diane and I can continue to instill better self-esteem in Shirley before the end of the year so she can start high school with a desire to succeed.
Whitney has also made an incredible jump. She consistently seeks to respond in most classes, though more could be done to encourage more responses. I'm very proud of her; she's a popular, nice student who is discovering that learning is something worthwhile. And that's a great victory.
"Sophia" has been waving me over at least once a day in classes for a little bit of help. She seemed to be in an unhappy place on Tuesday. When I realized that she was being resistant to doing the work in social studies, I turned it into a joke. I told her, "I know this isn't the most enjoyable but I am going to make it the most exciting thing you'll do all day!" This is very different from how I approached Sophia earlier in the year; back then, I employed a much more forceful style. But when I saw Sophia smile, I knew that I had made the right decision. Completing her work for its own sake is pointless. I'd rather Sophia realize that she can't just give up because she's unhappy – she has to find a little bit of joy to push her through.
These moments happened in the early part of Tuesday. By the afternoon, I was dreading going to English class. The students had been assigned a project over a month ago and it was due Tuesday. Diane had been reminding every eighth grader she saw to complete it for the past week or two but I was still concerned that a lot of students wouldn't have it ready. And, unfortunately, most of the students in my class didn't. But I was incredibly proud when "Whitney," Audrey and Sophia got up to hand theirs in. I started fist pumping in the air and cheering; Whitney pointed back at me and said, "Look at Paul!" I want these students to know how proud I am of them when they do their work. In fact, "Hal," a student I regularly see during the day, came up and said, "I have most of mine done! I just have one thing left!" I don't want the students to do their work to please anyone, especially me. I just want them to feel like somebody cares about their academic success.
The end of the week brought a return to Camp Lincoln, the site of our first day of service back in September. It was designed to be a day for corps members and our Timberland mentors to work together on a few projects around the camp. It was really neat, the full circle aspect of the day. It was where we were first introduced to PT; on Friday, I got to help lead PT with other first year corps members. I spent the morning working in the amphitheatre, where I had worked back on that first day of service. When we debriefed that afternoon, I talked about how proud I am of how far we've come as a site over the year. On Friday, it hit me that this is all ending soon. In a few weeks, I'll never see this group of people in the same place again. It's a little sad but I won't get bogged down in melancholic gloom. I have to do my best to make the next five weeks the most powerful I can.
But there have also been some victories. "Shirley" and "Whitney" have made incredible progress since the beginning of the year. In math class, Shirley figured out how to find the area of an irregular figure with minimal guidance from me. When I told her how smart she is and great she is doing, I caught her smiling. I'm really hoping that Diane and I can continue to instill better self-esteem in Shirley before the end of the year so she can start high school with a desire to succeed.
Whitney has also made an incredible jump. She consistently seeks to respond in most classes, though more could be done to encourage more responses. I'm very proud of her; she's a popular, nice student who is discovering that learning is something worthwhile. And that's a great victory.
"Sophia" has been waving me over at least once a day in classes for a little bit of help. She seemed to be in an unhappy place on Tuesday. When I realized that she was being resistant to doing the work in social studies, I turned it into a joke. I told her, "I know this isn't the most enjoyable but I am going to make it the most exciting thing you'll do all day!" This is very different from how I approached Sophia earlier in the year; back then, I employed a much more forceful style. But when I saw Sophia smile, I knew that I had made the right decision. Completing her work for its own sake is pointless. I'd rather Sophia realize that she can't just give up because she's unhappy – she has to find a little bit of joy to push her through.
These moments happened in the early part of Tuesday. By the afternoon, I was dreading going to English class. The students had been assigned a project over a month ago and it was due Tuesday. Diane had been reminding every eighth grader she saw to complete it for the past week or two but I was still concerned that a lot of students wouldn't have it ready. And, unfortunately, most of the students in my class didn't. But I was incredibly proud when "Whitney," Audrey and Sophia got up to hand theirs in. I started fist pumping in the air and cheering; Whitney pointed back at me and said, "Look at Paul!" I want these students to know how proud I am of them when they do their work. In fact, "Hal," a student I regularly see during the day, came up and said, "I have most of mine done! I just have one thing left!" I don't want the students to do their work to please anyone, especially me. I just want them to feel like somebody cares about their academic success.
The end of the week brought a return to Camp Lincoln, the site of our first day of service back in September. It was designed to be a day for corps members and our Timberland mentors to work together on a few projects around the camp. It was really neat, the full circle aspect of the day. It was where we were first introduced to PT; on Friday, I got to help lead PT with other first year corps members. I spent the morning working in the amphitheatre, where I had worked back on that first day of service. When we debriefed that afternoon, I talked about how proud I am of how far we've come as a site over the year. On Friday, it hit me that this is all ending soon. In a few weeks, I'll never see this group of people in the same place again. It's a little sad but I won't get bogged down in melancholic gloom. I have to do my best to make the next five weeks the most powerful I can.
Friday, May 14, 2010
Overcoming Frustration and Uncertainty
Waking up Monday morning, I knew I had to get moving and grooving to have a great day of service. I wasn't fully rested but I wouldn't use that as an excuse. In first period math, I struggled through a poor explanation of finding the area of a circle. The students were getting flustered and overwhelmed at first but some caught on and exclaimed, "This is easy!" Unfortunately, "Audrey" did not feel this way and she shut down. This response continued into second period FACS class when the students had to create a mosaic with some challenging qualifications. Audrey and other students repeatedly claimed the assignment was "stupid" and "dumb" and wondered why they had to do it. While I was trying to guide them through figuring out how to complete the work, Audrey said, "I'm not doing this." I lost my cool for a second and raised my voice. Thankfully I caught myself and calmed down before I started screaming at the students. The one positive that emerged from the moment was it woke me up and I was ready to be respectful and on for the rest of the day.
Our team meeting was a little overwhelming. We are in the final stage of teacher and student evaluations, which means a lot of paperwork for teachers. I don't mind handing them out but it is a lot of paper to manage. But all of the time and energy that we and the teachers spend on this work translates into improved service for more students who are at-risk for dropping out. Like PITW #124 says, "Everyone needs to do things that are not in the job description" – especially if they contribute to the greater good of our service.
Tuesday had a weird start to the day. Our team leader didn't come in until noon and two of our team members met us at school. We were all confused about whether to do PT like we usually do on Tuesdays or just go to first period. I was flustered over the confusion as well as the deviation from our normal schedule. But in second period I realized that I need to remember moccasins. Other people aren't trying to overwhelm or upset me – they just have things they want to accomplish.
In science class, students had a lab in which they had to dissect a chicken wing. They were investigating the muscles, tendons, ligaments and joints and comparing them to those of humans. It was a challenging lab because the first step was to remove the skin from the wing. I walked around trying to help but I felt like a dunce – I didn't think I was helping out whatsoever. Still, it was a great day – I am seeing a lot of progress in some of the students and I'm excited.
Thursday was a half day at Seabrook, so I saw it as the perfect opportunity to meet with Allie about the Resource Development project leader position. That's where I'll be serving next year and Allie wants to get me prepared for it. She went over all of the things she does during the week and the major projects of the year. It was very overwhelming; there's just so much to it and it's all so different from the world I'm in this year. But I felt this way on orientation way back in August. It's overwhelming, but only because there's so much that is new to me. Once I start working, I'll be fine. I was further comforted when I had lunch with most of the RD team.
In the afternoon, the Seabrook team met Taylor, our team buddy, for our Gift Seat feedback session. This session was different from the other feedback sessions we've done. With this, we took turns giving feedback to one person. It could have gone horribly because of some recent strife but everyone was respectful and honest. I got some great feedback about forcing positivity on others. Some people said that I should work on guiding others to it instead of trying to make people feel happy. When I've been in rough straits, I've respected others most when they've allowed me to address my feelings on my own terms. I need to do that for others. Sometimes people just need to be unhappy and come to the joy on their own time.
On Friday, we had a session on the National Service movement and how to promote it through letters to the editor and letters to congressmen. We also had the chance to learn about the local government in Seabrook. It's good to develop greater understanding of our civic leaders and capabilities, but there was one thing that really stood out about the session. It was presented by Joe, this year's Program and Training project leader, and Tony, the Program and Training project leader for next year. It's very exciting that the FY11 senior corps members are getting the chance to take on opportunities to learn through experience. I'm amazed by how far we've all come from the beginning of the year. There has been an incredible amount of growth and development for everyone; I've been fortunate to be a part of that.
Our team meeting was a little overwhelming. We are in the final stage of teacher and student evaluations, which means a lot of paperwork for teachers. I don't mind handing them out but it is a lot of paper to manage. But all of the time and energy that we and the teachers spend on this work translates into improved service for more students who are at-risk for dropping out. Like PITW #124 says, "Everyone needs to do things that are not in the job description" – especially if they contribute to the greater good of our service.
Tuesday had a weird start to the day. Our team leader didn't come in until noon and two of our team members met us at school. We were all confused about whether to do PT like we usually do on Tuesdays or just go to first period. I was flustered over the confusion as well as the deviation from our normal schedule. But in second period I realized that I need to remember moccasins. Other people aren't trying to overwhelm or upset me – they just have things they want to accomplish.
In science class, students had a lab in which they had to dissect a chicken wing. They were investigating the muscles, tendons, ligaments and joints and comparing them to those of humans. It was a challenging lab because the first step was to remove the skin from the wing. I walked around trying to help but I felt like a dunce – I didn't think I was helping out whatsoever. Still, it was a great day – I am seeing a lot of progress in some of the students and I'm excited.
Thursday was a half day at Seabrook, so I saw it as the perfect opportunity to meet with Allie about the Resource Development project leader position. That's where I'll be serving next year and Allie wants to get me prepared for it. She went over all of the things she does during the week and the major projects of the year. It was very overwhelming; there's just so much to it and it's all so different from the world I'm in this year. But I felt this way on orientation way back in August. It's overwhelming, but only because there's so much that is new to me. Once I start working, I'll be fine. I was further comforted when I had lunch with most of the RD team.
In the afternoon, the Seabrook team met Taylor, our team buddy, for our Gift Seat feedback session. This session was different from the other feedback sessions we've done. With this, we took turns giving feedback to one person. It could have gone horribly because of some recent strife but everyone was respectful and honest. I got some great feedback about forcing positivity on others. Some people said that I should work on guiding others to it instead of trying to make people feel happy. When I've been in rough straits, I've respected others most when they've allowed me to address my feelings on my own terms. I need to do that for others. Sometimes people just need to be unhappy and come to the joy on their own time.
On Friday, we had a session on the National Service movement and how to promote it through letters to the editor and letters to congressmen. We also had the chance to learn about the local government in Seabrook. It's good to develop greater understanding of our civic leaders and capabilities, but there was one thing that really stood out about the session. It was presented by Joe, this year's Program and Training project leader, and Tony, the Program and Training project leader for next year. It's very exciting that the FY11 senior corps members are getting the chance to take on opportunities to learn through experience. I'm amazed by how far we've all come from the beginning of the year. There has been an incredible amount of growth and development for everyone; I've been fortunate to be a part of that.
Friday, May 7, 2010
A Brief Week
The weather in New Hampshire at the beginning of the week reflected the general mood of the students at Seabrook Middle School: heavy, slow and sleepy. Summer is making its approach and it's being heralded by terrible humidity. Still, I am feeling really good about May and the next few months in general so I was happy to be back with the students. Unfortunately, throughout the day I didn't feel like I was making a big impact on my students. I felt adrift, like I was detached from my service in most classes. I think part of this was caused by the structure of some of the classes. In FACS, students were simply typing up handwritten work. The students in English class listened to the first few pages of Flowers for Algernon on CD. There wasn't an easy way for me to interact with them, other than nudging them to wake up.
My daily victory came in social studies. The teacher assigned students a project that they'll be working on for the next few days. They have to come up with a topic, formulate a question and use articles to answer it in a three to five minute speech. One student was struggling to come up with a topic. He found an interesting article about Blackwater and their involvement in the deaths of 17 Iraqi civilians. He considered doing his speech using that article but thought it would only last ten seconds. I thought of the Right Question Project and used the title of the article as a prompt. His first question was, "Why did they do it?" I prodded him – "What other questions could you ask?" He came up with, "Who is Blackwater?" He knew they were a military company, which led him to ask, "Why is a military company in Iraq?" They may seem like simple questions, but getting the answers to them will help him flesh out his speech. I talked with the teacher after class about using it with the entire class. He agreed that it's a neat concept and will think about a good future topic to use it with. Victories!
It was a short week for me – I went out of town Thursday and Friday so I was only at school for three days. The feelings of uselessness returned on Tuesday and Wednesday – I didn't think I was really helping. With only a few weeks left in school, my ability to help improve students' grades is limited. These thoughts and feelings have caused me to shift my approach to in-school service. In a few months, my students will become high school freshman, a role that many are concerned about. I plan on spending the next five weeks continuing to model positive behavior and supporting my students as they look forward to next year. I want them to head off into the wild blue yonder confident that they will be able to be successful. They need to know it will be difficult, but they can do it. If I can support them in the shift, I've done a great job.
P.S. This is just a reminder that City Year is in the running to win $250,000 from Pepsi as part of their Pepsi Refresh project. If you would like to support City Year, all it takes is a few clicks and 26 seconds. Remember, every 26 seconds a student drops out of school. Let's take that time to end that crisis. Vote for City Year here.
My daily victory came in social studies. The teacher assigned students a project that they'll be working on for the next few days. They have to come up with a topic, formulate a question and use articles to answer it in a three to five minute speech. One student was struggling to come up with a topic. He found an interesting article about Blackwater and their involvement in the deaths of 17 Iraqi civilians. He considered doing his speech using that article but thought it would only last ten seconds. I thought of the Right Question Project and used the title of the article as a prompt. His first question was, "Why did they do it?" I prodded him – "What other questions could you ask?" He came up with, "Who is Blackwater?" He knew they were a military company, which led him to ask, "Why is a military company in Iraq?" They may seem like simple questions, but getting the answers to them will help him flesh out his speech. I talked with the teacher after class about using it with the entire class. He agreed that it's a neat concept and will think about a good future topic to use it with. Victories!
It was a short week for me – I went out of town Thursday and Friday so I was only at school for three days. The feelings of uselessness returned on Tuesday and Wednesday – I didn't think I was really helping. With only a few weeks left in school, my ability to help improve students' grades is limited. These thoughts and feelings have caused me to shift my approach to in-school service. In a few months, my students will become high school freshman, a role that many are concerned about. I plan on spending the next five weeks continuing to model positive behavior and supporting my students as they look forward to next year. I want them to head off into the wild blue yonder confident that they will be able to be successful. They need to know it will be difficult, but they can do it. If I can support them in the shift, I've done a great job.
P.S. This is just a reminder that City Year is in the running to win $250,000 from Pepsi as part of their Pepsi Refresh project. If you would like to support City Year, all it takes is a few clicks and 26 seconds. Remember, every 26 seconds a student drops out of school. Let's take that time to end that crisis. Vote for City Year here.
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